2.What are you doing? I said stop making lists. Listen to me. I’m on the internet making a list. I have mysterious authority and imaginary power over you.
3. Bear in mind how vexing it is to read these horrible, horrible lists. Conjure a mental image of the person sitting around on the internet all day, avoiding life and interaction with embodied humans, and judge them very, very harshly. Then do not make them lists.
4. Buy one of our hot cool products, listed in our electronic e-store: The Listless Ring. Tweet a picture of yourself wearing one with a smug look. Success! No lists.
5. Finally, just stop it. Stop it!